Have you ever reflected on a point in your life and thought, “Well that went differently than I ever could have imagined”? For better or for worse.

If yes, you aren’t alone.

As I sit here at age 40, I can’t help but think of all the details in my life thus far that I never predicted in my wildest dreams—or worst-case scenarios. The joy and the pain. Wins and failures. And God’s faithfulness through it all.

Faithfulness

That’s a loaded word.

To be faithful is to be “true to one’s word, promises, vows, etc.” and “steady in allegiance or affection.” All of this is exactly what I’ve experienced with God.

He keeps his promises. He never stops loving me, no matter what I do.

One of God’s promises is found in Ephesians 3:20 (GW): “Glory belongs to God, whose power is at work in us. By this power he can do infinitely more than we can ask or imagine.” I wrote a whole separate post on the word ABLE in this verse (from a different Bible translation), but here I want to emphasize the last part—that He promises His power “can do infinitely more than we can ask or imagine.”

Imagine

I don’t know about you, but I grew up with an active imagination. Books transported me. Nature inspired me. “What ifs” and wonder kept me creative and curious. I thought I could imagine big. But now I know that the biggest dreams I ever had don’t compare to the reality of my life. Again, the good and the bad.

Of course, no one ever really imagines the bad, right? Unless it’s fear of what could go wrong. Even then, I never thought my life would go the way it did—or that God would help me through the very worst and use it for good.

One thing I’ve learned about the bad—at least, the bad choices I made—is to never say never. To never assume I’m not capable of a particular sin. That’s pride, and the Devil thrives on it.

Learn from me. Don’t let pride keep you from staying alert to all the temptations—major and minor—in your life. I’ll share a few examples in a minute.

Because… that wonder in my soul got me pondering what it would be like to tell my younger self how my future actually turned out.

I’ll never know, of course, and I believe it’s a blessing not to know the future and leave it in God’s hands. But still, here’s how I think it might have gone.

Five Year Old Me

If I told five year old me—sitting on the hood of my grandpa’s car in the local airport parking lot, watching planes take off and land, desperate to go and see the world—that I would travel solo to 14 countries before the age of 40 (and to 21 other countries total)…

I probably would’ve thought that sounded crazy. Cool, but… wow. That many countries?? And why would I travel alone? I’m a girl.

Five year old me never imagined just how adventurous I would be.

Ten Year Old Me

If I told ten year old me—a quiet kid who read fiction books nonstop—that I would one day speak at a women’s conference and write a devotional book…

I think I would have doubted my abilities and labeled myself as too shy with nothing worth talking about. Plus, back then, non-fiction bored me. And what would qualify me to write anything about God?

Ten year old me never imagined getting so far out of my comfort zone and letting God speak through me.

Fifteen Year Old Me

If I told fifteen year old me—about to lose a few pounds—that my temporary diet would turn into disordered eating and eventually become an eating disorder that would consume me till age 33…

I definitely would have denied it and justified my actions as healthy. No way would I ever let it get out of control.

Fifteen year old me never imagined I would face such a serious battle for my life.

Twenty Year Old Me

If I told twenty year old me—in a long-term relationship with a Christian guy—that we would be married in two years and I would divorce him for another guy after eight years of marriage…

I absolutely would have sworn it was impossible. Divorce was not an option in my mind.

Twenty year old me never imagined anything but a happy Christian marriage, till death do us part.

Thirty Year Old Me

If I told thirty year old me—still struggling with bulimia and about to divorce my husband for that other guy and move to Florida—that God would rescue me from my eating disorder…

That God would give me a remote job…

Bless me with the means to travel the world…

Then, ask me to move to Tennessee, where I would meet a man far better than I thought I needed… and get remarried…

I’m sure I would have laughed in disbelief, and instead believed the lie that there was no hope for me. That I was too far gone. Unable to ever restore my relationship with God or deserve a second chance at marriage. That I was incapable of truly living again.

Thirty year old me never imagined being free or forgiven or worthy of a future filled with joy.

Forty Year Old Me

Today, you can bet that forty year old me—after experiencing all of the above—fully believes my God will continue to do “infinitely more than [I] can ask or imagine” (Ephesians 3:20)…

I’ve seen God move in my life. Help me overcome the seemingly impossible. Give me more than I deserve. And use me in ways I never saw coming.

So how can I not believe?

I don’t write this to glorify my life or point out how blessed I am. I share only to point all the glory to God. He forgives. He is gracious. He multiplies what we give back to Him.

Whatever the future holds, I know it will be different, bigger, and better than anything I might dream right now.

That’s God’s promise to all who believe.

How have you seen God do “infinitely more” in your life?