During my single, solo travel years, I often repeated this phrase to myself while browsing social media or googling options for future adventures.

Don’t be jealous. Be inspired.

Though I won’t sit here and assume I was the first person to coin the expression, I did make it up in my head. Recognizing signs of envy at the sight of other travelers’ photos, I realized that needed to change — and an internal pep talk turned into my own personal catchphrase.

But again, I’m not attempting to take credit for it, lest it’s trademarked somewhere.

I only want to share it now for anyone who might need the reminder, too.

Jealousy and Comparison vs. Peace and Contentment

After meeting and marrying my husband in 2020, I’m no longer single or a solo female traveler. Yet, I haven’t outgrown the phrase.

Jealousy can rear its ugly head in just about any area of life. I’ve certainly felt jealous of others’ careers, success, possessions, physical and personality traits, and even their God-given gifts.

I go deeper on comparison in another blog post, but let me note here that comparison is where jealousy sprouts and spreads. And jealousy, left untreated, is all-consuming. The Bible confirms this very truth in Proverbs 14:30 (NIV).

“A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones.”

Rotting is a slow death. I don’t know about you, but that’s not how I want to live. And the first part of that verse in Proverbs holds the key to a better way. God’s way.

Life without jealousy — without a slow, rotting death — is found through “a heart at peace.” For me, peace equals contentment.

The Apostle Paul gives a fantastic example of contentment in Philippians 4:11-12 (NLT):

“…I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. ¹² I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little.”

And in verse 13, Paul shares the key to being content: “For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.”

Feeling jealous? Take it to God. Ask Him for wisdom. Ask Him to open your eyes to the truth. Trust Him for the ability to be thankful for what you do have and turn away from the things you don’t.

That is the way to peace. Just a few verses back in Philippians 4, Paul shares more about this life-giving peace that only comes from God.

“⁸ And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. ⁹ Keep putting into practice all you learned and received from me—everything you heard from me and saw me doing. Then the God of peace will be with you.”

Once you reach a level of contentment, it is far easier to feel happiness for others without any envy attached. Merriam-Webster defines envy as: “a painful or resentful awareness of an advantage [or perceived advantage] enjoyed by another person, joined with a desire to possess that same advantage.”

When you lose the resentment, that “desire to possess” becomes less intense. While it’s not wrong to want to experience something for yourself, it is wrong to allow bitterness to form in your heart. Peace and bitterness can’t coexist!

Desire without bitterness or envy is more aligned with dreaming. And dreams often start with inspiration.

Inspiration and Motivation

I’m partial to Merriam-Webster’s first definition of inspire: to spur on : MOTIVATE.

Letting go of envy or jealousy and replacing it with healthy motivation has been a game-changer for me. Thoughts like, “That’s not fair!” or “They’re so lucky!” can be reframed to “That’s amazing! I’m adding that to my bucket list!” or “WOW. What step can I take today to work toward achieving that myself?”

One thing I learned years ago is that dreams don’t just come true without action. Yes, God asks us to give our plans to Him; however, if we never make plans or take steps to pursue a dream, it’s certainly not fair to resent other people for living out “our dreams” without knowing what it took for them to get there.

For me, booking seven solo international trips in a span of three years required lots of planning and prioritizing. It required strict budgeting that kept me from buying things I didn’t need. And it also required a lot of prayer and time with God.

Here’s what the Bible says about dreaming, planning, and taking action—God’s way:

Proverbs 16:1-3 (NLT) “¹We can make our own plans but the LORD gives the right answer. ²People may be pure in their own eyes, but the LORD examines their motives. ³Commit your actions to the LORD, and your plans will succeed.”

Let’s go back to verse two and talk about motives for a bit. It’s easy to tell if we are still harboring jealousy by examining our own motives. The truth is, God is going to do it anyway, so we might as well check ourselves first. Motives that are rooted in envy—in feelings of comparison and competition and keeping up appearances—are not pure or right. But a wrong motive can also be believing that the thing you desire will bring you true happiness. It won’t.

Only God offers lasting happiness. Understanding this is the key to keeping motivations healthy and plans open to God’s direction.

Fulfilling a Dream Won’t Keep You Happy

Solo travel taught me a lot of things, but one of the most profound was that fulfilling my dreams—even the ones God approves of—is not the key to lasting happiness. As much as I love to travel, allowing my travel plans to dictate my feelings or keep me from enjoying the normal days in between was not healthy.

I am so passionate about this topic that I published a travel devotional book about this very thing. (Get Travel with God on Amazon here.)

God wants us to be happy here on this earth. He intentionally designed us with unique passions and it is a joy for Him to see us lean into those passions with pure and peaceful hearts—not jealous ones.

So don’t be jealous. Be inspired.

And remember that NOTHING will ever make you as happy as living out the life God dreamed up just for you—His way, in His timing, with contentment.